All absolute ideas that an individual holds about his identity are only that -- ideas.
-- moi
I hate writing introspective, self-disclosing posts, but I hate elevator music even more.
I have tried to avoid turning this blog into so much Muzak, and I try to offer something of value to someone, somewhere, at least occasionally.
I can't even talk on this blog much about my real life, because I am a poor person who is a ward of the state, in certain ways, and part of the unwritten contract is that if you want to be on the dole, then you have to stop evolving in certain ways, at least in public, and especially regarding anything that has to do with improving your lot in life.
And I think that's pretty nasty.
Since this is a public record, then, I tend to keep my mouth shut nowadays about anything involving my own ambitions and aspirations. Public assistance can be a highly effective way, then, to control the have-nots, and to perpetuate societal myths. Just remember that any overnight sensation with lasting power took at least a decade to arrive. And that many people who are labeled sick are the ones who lead the system toward greater health. Often we're the ones with the most time on our hands -- always a dangerous thing.
The ones who annoy me, actually, are the ones who tend to use their sick as an excuse to avoid taking personal responsibility for their actions.
Still, I believe that if you knew me in real time, you would have a very different impression of who I am and what really counts in my life than what I present here.
It has less to do with my own ambitions, and more to do with supporting those I consider my intimates in expressing their truth, rather than the fictions we've been intimidated into accepting as the truth.
"There's violence all around us. It's a part of life. If you want to ask what it means, for me, it means that every day, society is trying to stamp you with their demands and desires, to shape you according to their needs. They're basically trying to rape you over with a sweet smile."
-- artist Lisa Alisa,
July 2004 interview (archived)
Yet I have not always been the most ethical or truthful person. Sometimes life forces us to compromise our integrity, just to get to the next note in a song. Do you know what I mean?
Or maybe you think that's self-justifying claptrap. Have you always been so forthcoming, then, regarding your own motives and means? I'll bet you haven't. We all do what we must in order to survive. Maslow Level I before Level 2, and all that.
And I am saying this to you now, only because I have made this bet with myself about doing thirty posts in thirty days, and that is the case only because I have hit a dry spell regarding my creative writing work, and doing this is one way, perhaps, to shock myself out of my inertia. So I don't expect any of it to have lasting power.
So please understand that, ultimately, anything I say here during this phase is self-serving. If you find that offensive somehow, then maybe you should take a closer look at your own motives and means. And if something I say here rattles against your brain cage in a way that inspires you, gives you hope, pisses you off, or merely connects, then we'll consider it gravy. There's always that danger.
For further reading:
What Is Self-Actualization?
Wishing you a beautiful day,
Bill Brent
[this page last updated: 2010.04.06, 2:00 p.m. Hawaii time]
